What every man needs to know
THE HORMONE HOSTAGE
THE HORMONE HOSTAGE KNOWS THAT THERE ARE DAYS IN THE MONTH WHEN ALL A MAN HAS TO DO IS OPEN HIS MOUTH & HE TAKES HIS LIFE INTO HIS OWN HANDS! THIS IS A HANDY GUIDE THAT SHOULD BE AS COMMON AS A DRIVER'S LICENSE IN THE WALLET OF EVERY HUSBAND, BOYFRIEND, CO-WORKER, OR SIGNIFICANT OTHER!
DANGEROUS: WHAT'S FOR DINNER?
SAFER: CAN I HELP YOU WITH DINNER?
SAFEST: WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO FOR DINNER?
ULTRA SAFE: HERE, HAVE SOME WINE.
DANGEROUS: ARE YOU WEARING THAT?
SAFER: WOW, YOU SURE LOOK GOOD IN BROWN!
SAFEST: WOW! LOOK AT YOU!
ULTRA SAFE: HERE, HAVE SOME WINE.
DANGEROUS: WHAT ARE YOU SO WORKED UP ABOUT?
SAFER: COULD WE BE OVERREACTING?
SAFEST: HERE'S MY PAYCHECK.
ULTRA SAFE: HERE, HAVE SOME WINE.
DANGEROUS: SHOULD YOU BE EATING THAT?
SAFER: YOU KNOW, THERE ARE A LOT OF APPLES LEFT.
SAFEST: CAN I GET YOU A PIECE OF CHOCOLATE WITH THAT?
ULTRA SAFE: HERE, HAVE SOME WINE.
DANGEROUS: WHAT DID YOU DO ALL DAY?
SAFER: I HOPE YOU DIDN'T OVER-DO IT TODAY.
SAFEST: I'VE ALWAYS LOVED YOU IN THAT ROBE!
ULTRA SAFE: HERE, HAVE SOME WINE.
13 THINGS PMS STANDS FOR:
1. PASS MY SHOTGUN
2. PSYCHOTIC MOOD SWING
3. PERPETUAL MUNCHING SPREE
4. PUFFY MID-SECTION
5. PEOPLE MAKE me SICK
6. PROVIDE ME with SWEETS
7. PARDON MY SOBBING
8. PIMPLES MAY SURFACE
9. PASS MY SWEATS
10. PISSY MOOD SYNDROME
11. POOR MEN SUCK
12. PACK MY STUFF
AND MY FAVORITE ONE
13. POTENTIAL MURDER SUSPECT
PASS THIS ON TO ALL OF YOUR HORMONAL FRIENDS & THOSE WHO MIGHT NEED A GOOD LAUGH!!...OR MEN WHO MAY NEED WARNING!!
7 comments:
What if you are a the 'girlie' half of a same-sex mariage, legal here in the Canadas, will the sound of your 'partner' have the same effect as that of a male?
PMS hit all relationship....Agree?
hits...oops
and 'relationships' too.
I agree.
You are taking a calculated risk by linking to my site on your sidebar. I am prone to copious amounts of profanity and I tend to engender some intensely vehement enemies. These enemies will often attack those that might show me even the slightest affection.
Be careful.
up for the challange...if thats the spelling...
close enuf
Some interesting ones in here,... lots seam to be strangely relevant!
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